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January 13th, 2013


08:20 pm - What 2013 holds...
Happy New Year world!

So I've decided that in order to get anything done this year, I need to set some goals. These largely consist of what I want to see and do and achieve in Manchester (as I'm at least here for the near future, but may not be for much longer) and, more specifically, things I want to see and do with Quinny while he's here. Here goes:

Things I want to see/do in Manchester in 2013:


  • Go to the Portico library
  • Go to more gigs, particularly in the Northern Quarter bars, as they're awesome and I don't feel like I make the most of them at the moment!
  • Eat at awesome restaurants that I haven't tried yet, particularly around Greater Manchester - my new TasteCard could come in handy for this

Restaurants in Manchester I want to eat at in 2013:
  • Evuna on Deansgate
  • Australasia?
  • Aumbry in Prestwich
  • The Strawbury Duck near Bury
  • El Rincón (again! - with Quinny)
  • Dimitri's (using my TasteCard :) )
  • Bakerie (with Quinny)

This will probably be continually updated as I remember/discover more things that I want to do, but it's a start! :)

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May 15th, 2011


08:35 pm - SlutWalk

"Society does not say don't rape, it says don't get raped." - Vicky Simister

Food for thought. If ever it were clearer that equality has not been established. The SlutWalk phenomenon has stirred up some uncomfortable, angered feelings in me, and has really brought to light the fact that this is still definitely a man's world. While women have more agency than ever, it seems that that agency is not yet complete. We are still positioned as this "Other" to maleness, this unpredictable, unkempt entity that society still regards from a male perspective. What about our perspective? Men are in a position where they can expect to be able to walk down the street shirtless on a sunny day without being attacked; why can't we? Clearly the engrained mentality of female objectification wields a far more sinister core than is understood.


Current Location: Manchester
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative

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July 7th, 2010


02:20 pm - Wise words from a trashy novel
"One thing I've learned is that if you expect perfect behaviour you'll wait your whole life for it. Not because people don't know how to behave decently, but because no one else can ever interpret what you mean by perfect. Especially when you're changing your own definition every day. And even if you do find yourself attracted to someone who's willing to be controlled, then that's not a partner anyway, that's a slave."

- Louise Candlish, I'll Be There For You

Something to consider :) xxxxxx
Current Location: Seville!
Current Mood: contentcontent

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April 11th, 2010


03:40 pm - Have we been taught to imagine?
There is no escaping that the electricity flushed through every synapse in our brain must have been conditioned to present the world in a certain way by that world itself. Is there? Can we now only imagine scenarios in the ways deemed plausible and already concretized by those before us? Am I doomed to only picture things in accordance with certain schema laid out for me by Hollywood, by advertising, by other people's imaginings? How can I escape this interminable pattern? It saddens me to think that all my brain creates is not my own. Cerebral plagiarism? Nothing but the borrowing of ideas from previously witnessed sources? Does my brain undertake a clandestine self-censorship, producing only thoughts conforming to the paradigm of Western cultural ideology? Am I truly free to imagine at all?
Current Location: Manchester
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: Birdsong

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January 5th, 2010


04:43 pm - New Year, New Start
New Year's Resolutions:

1) Be more healthy! I tend to get it right for several weeks or so, then have a massive lapse and binge fest: no more!! If/when I decide to binge, I will now do it for a meal or two, then get back on track with general healthiness the next day. No need to fall off the wagon just because I feel like a treat! :p

2) Be realistic about going to the gym. Go a steady 2/3 times a week, thus not feeling guilty about not working enough but also getting enough regular work-out time.

3) Be positive!! Look on the bright side!! The past year seems to have ground me down a bit on the "looking on the bright side" thing, but things are hardly ever as bad as I seem to think they are! Smile even when I feel like frowning, because it instantly makes me feel better :) Stop overthinking things, definitely! And stop crying so much for no apparent reason would be a great one to achieve!


Think they can basically be summed up as "Be realistic" and "Be content with myself". I definitely need to find that balance of acceptance. Avoid negativity at all costs: it does no one any favours, least of all me. As wonderful Russell Howard says, the world is a beautiful, wonderful, incredible place and we should at no costs take the magical little everyday things for granted. I might even start trying to make a note of funny/sweet things I notice from day to day. Life's too short to be unhappy, and we have it so much better than so many people in the world. It's time I started knowing that for myself! :)

Hope everyone else has a fantastic 2010...have to get used to writing that date..! Anyways, onwards with the revision timetable to try and motivate myself back into Work Mode....that Christmas break was far too welcome! :p Loads of love xxxxxxx
Current Location: Daisy Bank Villas, Manchester
Current Mood: optimisticoptimistic
Current Music: Radio 1

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December 1st, 2008


12:11 pm - blaahh
Ok, am bored at work, and after reading Sam's journal (glad to hear your dissertation's sorted honey :) ) have decided I'm going to update properly and think about this week in a positive light as opposed to the outlook I have on it at the moment.

Today I'm at work, don't have much to do but yay it's the 1st December :)! So can start looking at events for January to write about, so at least that's something to do. Tis still very cold in here; I still need to buy some gloves, my hands get freezing from typing all day! Steph left on Saturday so have been trying to avoid realisation that she's not here any more, which was very effective thanks to Ru coming to visit!! :D Had an AMAZING weekend, was soo busy and did soo much sightseeing and things, was Ace :D but barely had any sleep lol, we kept having naps at random times of the day just to generate more energy to go out and do more stuff later! We went to all the Gaudi places - Sagrada Familia, then had a Menu del Dia for 10 euros which consisted of fideua (paella but with noodly pasta stuff instead of rice - am absolutely loving paella now!! Can't believe how much I like seafood now considering a couple of years ago I would not have TOUCHED it..is mad! :)) and then squid rings which were sooo good at this place..then had a fruit salad for pudding, plus bread and a drink. What a bargain! Then went on to Casa Batllo (I refused to do the audio tour again lol - Ruth did some but found it too funny/ridiculous so gave up) then wandered down Passeig de Gracia and looked around at pretty lights and stuff, then went home for a nap I think lol..got up quite late, went for pizza eventually at Calero's in Sants (soo good! Got sangria too :D), then went back to flat, got ready to go out and drank whiskey neat (was about 6 euros, was like lighter fluid lol, but oh well, was only alcohol we had!!) then went to Jamboree :D I used my card and got in free!! But split entry with Ru as was 10 euros. Got drinks and sat drinking and listening to music/people watching then went and danced. Met random friendly Spanish people and danced with them, then randomly these Irish blokes came and danced with us (must've noticed we were English cause we were singing all the words!) for the rest of the night! Was an AWESOME night, the music was fantastic! Drinks 9 euros though, eeek! Had said we'd leave early because we wanted to get up on Sunday but that didn't really happen lol, was too fun!! Staggered home to bed at 6am and still managed to get up at 9/9.30 (have NO idea how!), made it out of the house by about 11.30 (took a while to get ready, were basically zombified at that point..) and headed for Pl. Espanya on metro to change for Paral.lel to go to Montjuic and cable cars :D stopped off at Espanya cause Ruth wanted to see the Art Gallery thing by the fountains; there was some kind of kids' marathon event going on..! Loads of advertising and people everywhere, think a radio station too. Took photos then went to get metro. Took funicular (funny train thing that goes up hill) to Montjuic, got cable cars which I'd never done before - sooo cool!! Views over whoole city, could see the sea and everything, amazing :) was gutted I hadn't got to take Quinny there tbh, he would've loved it. Got to top and went round Montjuic castle - again, spectacular panoramic views, soo cool. Took lots of photos and went to café in castle to get sandwich for lunch. Headed back on cable cars and made way to Parc Guell :D again, amazing views, as always! Quite busy yesterday; was about 3ish when went, so probs quite popular jaunt on Sunday afternoon. Looked round a few of the tacky tourist shops on way back hehe; really considering getting an I <3 BCN t shirt! Don't know if I'd actually wear it though lol; these things always seem like a good idea at the time..hmm maybe. After that went to La Pedrera (Casa Milà); haven't been since I've lived here, was really cool :) Love the roof. Again couldn't be arsed with audio tour lol, was so shattered, not in mood for learning! Had very cool but very expensive gift shop; bought a few cool postcards with things written on that remind me of Barcelona :) wandered back down Pg. de Gracia into the centre; have found way to Gothic Quarter that I can actually remember, yay! Saw some cool buskers and dance troupes in Portal de l'Angel on way to Cathedral. Walked around it; is sooo ornate in there. Amazing. Was a Christmas market in square outside; oh yeah, we went round the Christmas markets outside the Sagrada Familia too! Sooo many 'cagatios' everywhere hahaha - basically 'pooing logs' - will explain if you ask..! Had explained story behind them to Ru and she kept laughing when we saw them lol. Oh yeah we got churros when we went to Sagrada Familia too - soooo good! So fatty though lol. Had very unhealthy weekend! Anyway... speaking of which haha, got waffles after looking around cathedral, from the place on Portal de l'Angel where it always smells so good! Had toffee and cream again - good, but has to be said, not nearly as good as the one I got from Patagonia when Quinny came to visit (but that was INCREDIBLE, so yeah.). Will remember that..! Then were so tired that we headed home for another nap. Can't believe we'd managed to keep going til that point on 3 hours sleep! Slept til about 9.30pm, then went to town to walk round Port and down the Rambla. Didn't have long as metro shut at 12, but Ru wanted to see port while she was there. She loved the buildings down there, and tried to take picture of Columbus' column but was very dark - he should be better lit at night, I thought he was! Not good enough lol. Headed back to Sants to get tapas at El Bocata, which I'd been eagerly anticipating all day :D Was mercifully open; was scared I was going to be disappointed! But oh no hehe :D had pan con tomate, prawns, bombas, bravas, fuet (Catalan chorizo thing, they sell it everywhere here, is soooo good!), chicken croquetas and queso manchego, which I was a bit apprehensive about as am pretty hit and miss with cheeses, but was perfect! Still 1,99 a plate :D love them!! And 1,50 wine :D and 1,90 beer! My kinda place :D so bill was about 17 euro...amazing. And it's right next door to mine! A real find, that one :D After tapas went home and went pretty much straight to bed lol, was not as exhausted after nap in evening but still slept like a log. :) AWESOME weekend!!

So...this week! Mulling through work today; then may or may not go to gym; have stuff with me but inexplicably came down with streaming cold over weekend, am slightly better now but still not feeling fab so we shall see. However if I go straight home I will probs just be bored; don't really feel like reading all night, may do later but not for whole evening. Have got loads of stuff to get on with though; MUST do some washing, room is a bin! Also still need to pick up this thing from the post office, but it's so out of the way and it's such a pain if it's not open when I get there (as it wasn't last time)...may do that on Wednesday, not sure. So yeah, oo think tonight I was gonna treat myself to settling down with one of Quinny's DVDs, so may do that. :) Early nights this week, methinks - am shattered and really want to be in tip top condition for Friday - am going to Manchester!!! :D:D:D Am sooo excited, miss Quinny sooo much and absolutely can't WAIT to see him :D So at least I have that to look forward to. Spoke to Maria on Friday; basically looks like we won't have internet before I leave :( they've been constantly ringing Telefonica to try and get a phone line installed but simply can't get through, and without that, we can't get internet :( GAAAYYY ARSES. Spanish Admin is SHOD; I shall never complain about English organisation again! Have dentist tomorrow after work; am even seeing that as a way to fill the time, if that gives you some idea of my boredom/loneliness lol. NO, positive thinking!! Will be nice to have healthy clean teeth for Christmas holidays :) haha. Then probably gym again; think I'm gonna be eating soup for pretty much the rest of the time I'm here - have 7 tins now after Mum and Quinny bringing me supplies when they came to visit! Am very grateful but have been rationing them and now have loads and only 2 1/2 weeks left lol! Lots of soup for Nikki...oh well, need to be healthier anyway! Then Wednesday was planning on treating myself to going to Starbucks in the evening to use Skype and WiFi in general as have none at home and nowhere to speak to people any more. (the Gayness of it all.) So may do that; really want to go to gym as much as possible before I leave though - will not have gym membership at home and is great to have it! Have Facebooked a couple of my mates here asking if they want to meet up for coffee/cinema/generally do stuff lol, hoping I can fill my time reasonably well. Read email from Uni today though saying about how proactive we should be being in our language learning, but it's so bloody hard to meet Spanish people!! Seriously, they're a lot more elusive than you'd think; going home to their parents every weekend, I dunno. GAH. So that's put me on a bit of a downer today; I'm trying to put in all this effort, I really am, but it's exhausting enough living out here in a foreign country and culture on your own with pretty much no friends, without adding to your plate all these extra activities which involve speaking in Spanish all the time, which is brain-frying enough. *sigh*..I swear hardly anyone else is really getting much Spanish either, though; from what I see on facebook, everyone is pretty much hanging out with the other English uni people in their city and just doing stuff with them all the time. So I don't feel quite so bad; but then from a personal point of view, I really want MY Spanish to improve, it doesn't matter what everyone else is doing...! SIIIGH. I think it's got better but I'm really disappointed in my job, tbh; I really thought I'd be a lot more submerged than I have been, and while it does mean it's nice and easy going, it's not exactly helping me improve as I'd hoped it would. Grrrr. Oh well, maybe I'll just go to the Spanish cinema like every night until I leave lol.

Also, CATHERINE'S COMING TO VISIT!!! On the 17th!! AND she's flying back with meee!!! So I will a) have someone to keep me company all the way home! and b) she's bringing a suitcase so I can put a load of my stuff in it and hopefully won't be over the weight limit!!! Which was looking like a major dilemma, so am Sooo pleased about that! And yaaay I'll have someone to go round all the Christmassy markets and things with :) I can't wait to see her!!

Having very mixed feelings about leaving now; I can't WAIT to be home, but I'm pretty aware it's probably gonna be an anticlimax, especially considering how much I've built it up lol. It'll still be nice though, and AWESOME to see everyone. Also, I really want to appreciate it here while I'm here, not least cause if I do that then the contrasts of home will be even more apparent (in a good way :)). Am reeally gonna miss the amazing food here though, and the atmosphere; the Gaudi things and being able to go to Parc Guell whenever I want; the way there's always a buzz in the city and something going on; the countless new places to explore...I love it here. The real shame is that I don't really have anyone to see it with. I really wish you guys were out here.

See you on the 19th!!!! I can't wait!!

Love you all loads xxxxxxxxx
Current Location: Go and Connect, Pl Urquinaona, Barcelona, Spain!
Current Mood: blahblah
Current Music: Iron Maiden - Journeyman

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11:54 am - Amazing song
Metallica - The Outlaw Torn

And now I wait my whole lifetime
For you
And now I wait my whole lifetime
For you

I ride the dirt I ride the tide
For you
I search the outside search inside
For you

To take back what you left me
I know I'll always burn to be
The one who seeks so I may find
And now I wait my whole lifetime

I'm Outlaw torn
I'm Outlaw torn
And I'm torn

So on I wait my whole lifetime
For you
So on I wait my whole lifetime
For you

The more I search the more my need
For you
The more I bless the more I bleed
For you

You make me smash the clock and feel
I'd rather die behind the wheel
Time was never on my side
So on I wait my whole lifetime


I'm Outlaw torn
I'm Outlaw torn
Yeah I'm Outlaw torn
And I'm torn

Hear me
And if I close my mind in fear
Please pry it open
See me
And if my face becomes sincere
Beware
Hold me
And when I start to come undone
Stitch me together
Save me
And when you see me strut
Remind me of what left this outlaw torn

Hear me
And if I close my mind in fear
Please pry it open
See me
And if my face becomes sincere
Beware
Hold me
And when I start to come undone
Stitch me together
Save me
And when you see me strut
Remind me of what left this outlaw torn


LOVE this song. Especially the bit at the end - S&M version is amaaazing. Hetfield's voice is sooo stunning in that performance. Just had to put it down to remember it; love the lyrics too. Ahhhh :D
Current Location: Go and Connect, Pl Urquinaona, Barcelona
Current Mood: mellowmellow
Current Music: Metallica - The Outlaw Torn

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October 31st, 2008


02:58 pm - Spain Spain Spain..
am mostly updating my other blog (http://shortandginger.blogspot.com i think!) with news of my travels, but thought I should write on here as i haven't in a month..! Manchester truly was amazing :) oh my gosh my heart was pounding soo much when i met him at the airport....i saw his head turning away just as i came round the corner, and i snuck up behind him, then he turned around when i was about 5 paces away, and we just ran full tilt at each other :D:D:D ahhh it's giving me such a rush just remembering it!! I held him in my arms and could just hear his heart beating out of his chest as i hugged him....i haven't been that breathless in as long as i can remember (and i've been pounding the gym 5 days a week! :p)...it was just INCREDIBLE. seeing him again was magical.

And now he's coming out here this time NEXT WEEK!!! i was ill the week i got back from Manc (as predicted, trip back was horrible, but luckily was so early in the morning i slept through the whole flight lol) so that was a bit crap, but since then time has flown by in hindsight! a WEEK....yaaay!! And it's November tomorrow...! Is insane how fast it's going now..pace has definitely picked up. Having said that, am in work now and it's literally me and Steph in the office; everyone else has gone for lunch/out delivering the new issue. I have full articles in this one and everything! Work is still pretty damn boring but I can at least see more rewards from it as I'm being given more significant work. :) It's soo boring today though; have hardly done anything - have to research second hand shops and things in Valencia, and just can't find anything.. same for Circuses in V. in December...all seems to be from 2006 or 2007. GRR :|

Issue that arose yesterday: as I've just had a big rant about on my other blog, internet in our flat has gone down as of yesterday morning :'( basically think the people we were nicking it off have got a password so we can't get on it any more :( but will still be able to use WiFi in library, Starbucks etc and are plenty of internet cafes around. in fact 1 a few doors down from my flat lol. And Steph's still works so hopefully will be able to use it round there, though it didn't work last night. But has done before so should do. Have to say, thing I'm dreading most about it is not being able to Skype Quinny, we usually chat every night pretty much. Oh and play him at Scrabble on facebook lol :p I'm addicted, it's so much fun! He's beating me though :s! Ohh i looove that about him, we can just do anything together and it's always so much fun, especially intellectually challenging things, it's so good...he's got such an inquisitive mind, it's soo attractive as well...man, I can't describe it but it just excites me :)

Oh well, way i'm trying to look at internet situation is at least I'll have to read my books/get out of the house in order to avoid boredom... just really have relied on that form of contact with people. I'm sure we'll get it sorted very soon - the girls will need it for their work too, so is pretty urgent. Gonna go pound the gym later to relieve frustrations and kill some time that would probably otherwise be sent in the flat getting pissed off about lack of internet. POWERRR.

love you all loads, keep me posted on what you're up to! miss you tons, not long til Christmas now :D i can't wait!!
Current Location: Plaza Urquinaona, Barcelona!
Current Mood: blahblah
Current Music: Delirium - Silence (Airspace remix) - TUNE!!

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March 20th, 2008


02:44 pm - News..:)
Don't have time to write much now, but just had to put this up here...

...it finally happened :D Quinny and I are official! :) after beating around the bush for over a year.. we decided we want to be together, so why not :) Also it has to be said that I initiated it :)! I'm getting better at this....basically he could tell something was up so asked me to tell him, and I said that i really like him but was worried if we continue messing around that I was just going to become more and more attached to him, and as I don't know what he wants from/thinks about the situation that could be something I want to avoid to avoid getting hurt. So....he said "I really like you; the only reason I haven't suggested we make a go of it is because I know you're going away next year, and I could be setting myself up to get really hurt." :( so that was all :'( for a moment. We spent the rest of the morning pondering this while enjoying each other's company, and when it came for me to leave...oh, i'll write it out in dialogue, more interesting lol :

Q: "Have a good weekend with those two bantering you about us! :p"
N: "Oh i know, it's not fair!..what shall i say to them?"
Q: *hugs* "it's completely up to you hun. tell them whatever you want."
N: *hugs back* "But i don't want to tell them something that's not what you want.."
Q: "I want whatever you want"
N: *sigh :p* "but I don't want to do something that you're not happy with"
Q: "well...what would you suggest?"
N: "...I'd suggest we gave it a go, because if we really like each other, what have we got to lose. what do you think?"
Q: "yeah. I want to be with you. *hugs, smiles* and if i'm going to get hurt either way, i might as well enjoy the time with you than put myself through not being with you, right?"
N: "yeah :) so....shall we give it a go?"
Q: "yeah." :) *kiss*

:D:D:D:D!!! haha some of that doesn't sound the most romantic, but it was the sweetest of moments. i'm absolutely walking on air at the moment. it's so awesome especially as we were so close before, so we know each other really well and feel so comfortable with each other, and get on like a house on fire....ohhh it's just the best :)

so now i'm back in bristol and miss him like crazy lol. :( though it does make it exciting and awesome when we speak to each other; just having that contact with him makes me feel all warm and fuzzy :) eeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

......:D *grins*

anyway i better go lol, getting the train to dad's now...

*sighhh* bliss. :)

love you all loads :) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx *skips to train station*
Current Location: Brizzle - i loves 'ee (got Beast t-shirts now :D)
Current Mood: giddygiddy

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February 6th, 2008


09:06 pm - Lent '08
Soooo...been nearly a month since I wrote on here, apparently! So here we go. Since the last entry...

- yes I did go to Preston :) and am so so glad :)! Kiddo looked so happy :) Had an awesome awesome night and was so great to see everyone, even if I did come back to Manchester some days later and see several of them again lol. It was great. :)

- After that, came back to Brizzle and had a few more nights out (Propaganda's first night in Syndicate, anyone?!) which was great, then Tree's 21st on the Thursday night. Friday I just crashed out and went to the pub with Nick and some of his old workmates, which was nice :) and he came round on Saturday morning before I left, bless his cottons! Lovely, lovely boy :)

- So then obviously had the joyous train journey which I spent most of thinking ohh I'm going to miss everyone in Brizzle so much...but of course as soon as I got back here I remembered how lovely it was to be back and all the awesome people I'd see up here :) Quinny made me dinner (absolute star) so I didn't have to cook/face an empty cupboard and big late night shop when I got in, which was awesome :) that boy is actually my sunshine.

- Think I had a day off on the Sunday, just having a Day of Usefulness, hoovering, tidying etc (kinda left the place in a tip on my whirlwind trip to Preston lol) and getting food in. Then come Monday it was down to the library with me, geeking it up for exams after the overly decadent holiday I allowed myself for Christmas lol. Maaan, did I pay for it! Translation exam was ok I think, hard to tell. Spent the week after manically reading French novels and revising their content/themes/related historical/political movements etc. Oh my WORD. I have never worked so much in my life, I don't think! Just wanted to give myself a hope of passing, to be honest lol. Really didn't feel like I had one before that week...So weird as well, I've never been one to panic over exams. Strange. Anyway, results of those in March I think.

- Then came post-exam heaven :D! Went out with Sarah to ScuBar and Font Wednesday night, to treat myself to some tasty alcohol of which I had been deprived..then decided to go to 5th Ave as I felt like a bit of a rave to let off steam :) was great fun! Next night went to Zoo with the boys as they'd finished that day, which was good fun. Hadn't been before, got told at the last minute by Stu (who I ran into on the bus, was awesome!) that it was pretty much a Man Met version of the Bop...as in, cheese and general pop-ness, so was like :| hmm....though it was wicked fun and cheap too! Had a bit of a boogie which was perfect. Fuuun :D

Meeehh can't be arsed to backdate any more lol, so yeah..here I am, half way through Week 2 of Semester 2, Year 2, knee deep in work and general need-to-organise-life ness though it's not going too bad atm! New Year's resolutions managing ok lol...Also, yeah the big news I came on here to write about in the first place...I've given up meat for Lent (started today). Not too sure why, thought it would be an interesting experiment lol. Is fun so far :) also, just watched a video I got sent from a group on Facebook on meat.org....not very cheerful. Couldn't sit through it all. Bleurgh. So....kinda making me wonder if I will actually want to go back on meat after Lent is over, thanks to that? Hmm...or will it make me feel guilty if I do continue to eat it, knowing the torment the animals went through..? I dunno. I think I'd feel pretty bad if I forgot about the suffering they experience, but equally would be unable to eat it if I did remember. Which may be a good thing. Who knows? Hmmmm...we shall see, I guess.

Anyways, should go get on with some work, there's always more than enough to do, after all!

Love you all an absolute tonnage :)

hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Current Location: Maaaanc
Current Mood: contentcontent
Current Music: Radio 1

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